It was a Wednesday afternoon before leaving my office. I was dreading going home and facing the emptiness and silent that permeated every room. I was not looking forward to another long night. I was basically okay at the office; I could close my office door when I needed a moment to grieve, compose myself and return to the busyness of the work day. It was very different at home.
It all began several years ago when tragedy, pain and sadness came in my life like a flood. As I entered our bedroom calling my husband to come to dinner and he did not respond. I went over to him to wake him up, and found he not breathing. Oh Lord, this can't be what is going. Being a registered nurse and working in critical care for over 30 years, I immediately went into auto pilot. I called 911 and beginning administered cardiopulmonary resuscitation until the Para-Medics arrived. It was as if I had been sleep-walking and waking up from a terrible nightmare; however it was very real. It was as if a moment in time had vanished, the beginning of a life as I knew it never to be the same again.
From that moment, my entire life literally changed. He was rushed to the hospital and from the beginning and end, I experienced seven of the most painful and perplexing days and nights of my life. As he took his last breath, the past seven years and the times we had shared together literally flashed before my eyes. He was gone forever. We had been married only seven years and all of our plans and dreams were shattered.
I was extremely tired and feeling so alone this particular Wednesday. As I entered our home, I had a suffocating feeling of just the anticipating of going into our bedroom. I knew I needed God in an extraordinary way that day. I knew He was with me and I was giving Him praise and thanksgiving for all of the miraculous things He had done in and through my life.
Walking down the hall to the bedroom, I stopped immediately in the hallway. It was as if God placed His hand on my shoulder. I immediately cried out to the Lord. I simply said, God I need you!! I need to sleep and I need some relief for the emotional pain and emptiness I feel in my heart. Although I know you are with me, I miss my husband so much.
My groan was different this time It was a cry of desperation I felt in the depths of heart and soul. I can relate to the cry of King David had sleepless nights when he penned Psalms 18:6, when he said; "In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried out to my God; He heard my voice from His temple, And my cry came before Him, even to His ears." David cried out to the Lord, and the Lord heard him. David slept peacefully.
His residing presence through the Holy reminded me that I can count Him. In my groans which I could not find expressions; it was in that due time I become conscious of His presence and power. At that moment, the manifestation and experience of the blessing of His presence ushers me into victorious praise.
What made the difference? The assurance of God's presence and answered prayer brings praise. It is easier to sleep peacefully when we have full assurance that God is in control of circumstances. His presence does not mean an ending of the many difficult situations or the craziness of life problems and pain. It is the assurance of His presence that brings tranquility and quietness of in the face of the deafening winds of life, knowing of His ever presence.
You may witness others seemingly handling the circumstances of life with ease and confidence. You may ask yourself, what is wrong with me? I challenge you to view the circumstances of life from God's point of view, in order to appreciate His presence and glory in your life. You would like to know the reason for your pain, trials and even suffering; however, because He is Sovereign, He reserves the right not to always reveal it to you. As your heavenly Father He chooses to do in and through your life as He pleases for His glory. It's not up to us to always know His plan for you. Just know He does not make a mistake and you cannot improve upon His plan.
In the midst of tragedy, pain and disappointments you can trust that God to know what is best for our good. You also can experience the awesome presence of God in your praise by trusting Him with a kingdom mindset and a heart of faith. God's is able to be released to bring forth joy in the midst of the difficult situation.
His presence in my praise allowed me to develop a biblical perspective on the problems and painful situations in my life. Knowing this, helped me in understanding the purpose of pain and trials which drove me to a total dependence on God alone. I found comfort in being reminded that God was in control of my life. The manifestation of His response to me will revealed more of Himself to me increasing my faith and capacity to trust His promises through the times when I did not understand His purposes or His ways.
God revealed to me that when I view my circumstances in light of His character instead of His character in light of my circumstances, I come to see that He is never indifferent toward me, and that His uses the difficult circumstances of life for my good so I can be more fully united to Him.
When you experience His presence in your praise, He will reveal more of Himself to you, increasing your faith and capacity to trust His promises through the times when you do not understand His purposes or His ways.
Your needs will vary from time to time. The same urgency and intensity may not be felt. However, when we bring our needy lives before His mighty presence we find acceptance and help when we come face to face God in sincere praise and worship,
The almighty God, our Father invites himself into our company; he offers to sup with us. "Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise!" Psalm 95:2 (RSV) There is a blessing in committing your days to the Lord. Conclude your praise and worship with an act of personal commitment, promising God to follow His direction seeking His comforting presence throughout each day and be blessed,